im not a religious person, theres no reason for me to be. religion is usually pressured onto you by family. i dont have that problem (not to say its a bad thing, or maybe it is). so being a religious man is my choice, and i choose to keep my options open.
what i do like about most religious beliefs is that they all come with their own sets of decree. rules are good, good for regulation. but the punishments are always a little over the top. going to hell, raped by satan, reborn as an animal, whatever. those suck, big time.
there are bits and pieces of each religion that i find fascinating. id like to share them for a while, and in the end i'll imagine my own religion, perfectly catered to my own personality. you can all join my cult some day.
there's a lot to write so im gonna make this a mini-series (hopefully one that doesnt die after first issue). it's already getting kinda long so i'll start with a shorter post. so without further ado, here's part 1: OH MY GAH
according to my bullshit generator, the term oh my god comes from Christianity, which will be the main topic of part 1. here's what intrigues me about Christianity:
- heaven & hell- first of all, the afterlife, that sounds fun. anyway, i always wondered how big is heaven/hell, who's there, will it ever overpopulate? and what are you supposed to do? i just imagine that if i go to heaven i can be like "fuck ya, suck my dick and make me a bacon sandwich while i play video games all day". heaven must be full of fat, lazy, assholes.
- angels & demons- the populace of heaven and hell, aside from the gods, are the angels and demons. but are there any on Earth right now, just watching what we're doing. am i being watched right now. buncha creepers, heaven and hell are populated with pervs.
- apocalypse- so apparently god has a date on his calendar where he takes all the nice people of Earth and saves them somewhere. then leaves all the nasty people to eternal torment and death. basically starting with a clean slate. that seems like a real dick move.
so far everyone is heaven seems like a real ass, besides Santa Claus, which brings me to #4. - motha fuckin Christmas, presents and holidays, hell yea
lets end the list here then. overall i gotta say, the Christians that i know are pretty nice, but the whole concept seems pretty harsh to me. so id rather not be a Christian. unless heaven is actually a real place, and i need to be a Christian for admittance, then count me in!
stay tuned for the next issue of MY religion, where i will blog about one of the more fascinating "religions" in my mind.
oh and i'll just leave this video here too... oh my gah!
